Faith Bigger Than Anything Else

Bakit ba ganon? Minsan masaya ka minsan malungkot ka. Di ba pwedeng lagi ka na lang masaya? Di ba pwedeng di na tayo magkaroon ng problema. Minsan sinasabi natin sa sarili natin, "pag naglagpasan ko tong problema na to, ayos na, magiging masaya na ako" pero patuloy pa din ang ikot ng gulong ng ating buhay, sounds like a movie. Totoo, hindi na yata tayo mawawalan ng problema. Ang nakakatakot niyan, habang tumatanda tayo lalong dumarami ang problemang dumadating sa 'ting buhay.

A lot of times we see ourselves as a failure. A lot of time we are on the edge of giving up. Ang hirap kasi eh. "Di ko na kaya Lord" as i would always say. Bakit kaya ganon? How i wish i'm still a lil child who's only worry is to play. But as a lil child i didn't experience to play. Loosing a parent is one of the most difficult things that had happened to me. But on the brighther side, it made me a very strong person with faith that is deeply rooted. As i was growing up my only dream is to have a family of my own and let my kids enjoy their childhood. Pang pelikula, that's how my life story is. Not far from the drama you see on tv. When everything was provided for it was deep in my heart that i keep longing for something that will fill the hole in my heart. Yung pagmamahal ng isang nanay. To this point, the more i get older the more i miss her. Maybe our being together was too short and maybe the challenges in my life would have been easier had mom been here to comfort me.

But the greatest thing that happened to me is this faith i have. God just told me last night that no matter what happens, my faith will still be bigger than my problems. Just a great consolation. That's how the Lord consoles us in our sufferings. He wishes to join us to let us feel how important we are in His eyes. Little as we feel we are, we are big in His eyes. He embraces us in our times of joy but he embraces us more during our time of sufferings. And thru this suffering will we find the true joy and happiness.

May God bless our hearts as we continue to move on in our lives -- we will never be forgotten. Happy weekend!!

Tapes

Since Kassandra aka Kass aka babes is in the shop to get fixed i got myself a rental car for the meantime. The rental car did not have any cd player in it, all it has is a tape player. I never realized they still sell cars with tape players. ha! ha! But anyway, today i decided to dig into my old tapes and bring them with me. I'm not used to driving without listening to my music genre so i decided to play them in the car.

These tapes are like 10 years old and as i was playing it i would guess what song would be next. To my amazement i could still remember the songs in the tapes and i was just really surprised. Imagine they're more than 10 years old and maybe the last time i listened to them was a few years ago, how can i still remember? Then it dawned on me that i grew up listening to these tapes every single day. Tapes that made me feel good everytime i listen to them. It brings back so many memories. They made me smile and just reminded me how much i've really grown. I'm tellin ya, these tapes were major contributors to who i am now. ha! ha!

My goal in life now is to live a simple life. Right now, i don't desire any more material things. I only desire that i live my life to the fullest and be happy about it. Maybe i was really never the person who wants to be rich and famous. Life is so complicated when you're rich. I only want enough. :)

The Struggle

I often ask myself why i have to struggle with life and face battles that are out of my control. In my yearning to have a struggle-free life, i always find myself in humps and bumps. I have lived for only 28 years but it seems as if i have lived more than a 100 years already. Looking back i see myself going through a lot. In as young as 7 years old i have already suffered a major loss and that is my mom's passing. In those years God has molded me to become a stronger person. Each year would come and i'd be a different and better person. Yet it seems sometimes i don't feel that i have become or achieved a lot for myself. Maybe my goals are different, maybe my priorities are different. Or maybe i have set too much standard for myself. Either way i have become a different person in my own sense. I have known myself too well that i am not easily affected by what other people will have to say about me. God has directed me to this path and i'm willing to stand for it. The cross that this path bears is not light but i try to wrap my arms around it and embrace it in as much as i could only to show my God that i am willing. They say that to love God is not easy. One has to come out of his comfort zone and willing to to climb up the hill and go against the grain. This where i am now. I am goin up the hill and going against the grain. The path is hard. If i don't find happiness in this world maybe there is something in store for me beyond this earth.

Let me quote a nice reflection from St. Josemaria's writing in his book, The Forge:


141 As, sooner or later, you are surely bound to stumble upon the evidence of your own personal wretchedness, I wish to forewarn you about some of the temptations which the devil will suggest to you and which you should reject straight away. These include the thought that God has forgotten about you, that your call to the apostolate is in vain, and that the weight of sorrow and of the sins of the world are greater than your strength as an apostle.

None of this is true!

Good day everyone and God bless!

after the thrilling ride..

after the thrilling ride..
Originally uploaded by efrancisco99.